i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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