I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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