a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
