Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
