you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
