Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(712): View more from Iowa

Walk of Shame. In a state park.

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(903): View more from Texas

I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.

(214): View more from Texas

It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.

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(954): View more from Florida

I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.

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(719): View more from Colorado

I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(308): View more from Nebraska

Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?

(1-308): View more from Nebraska

i hate being the asshole.

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(512): View more from Texas

If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?

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(952): View more from Minnesota

My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions

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