After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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