dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
