just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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