I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Porn is love you can see.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
