I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
