I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
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