i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
