'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Randomize
