i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
