i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
