Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Randomize
