I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize