well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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