the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
