He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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