I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
