This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
