Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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