She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
