Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
