I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
