Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
it was like eating out sand paper
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
