38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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