Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
they need to just BURY HIM!
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
