if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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