Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
