my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I need to align my fucking chakras
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
