They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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