Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
