First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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