Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize