TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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