So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
God gave him joint rollers for hands
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
