tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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