i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
are you so shy because you have an std?
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
