no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
