She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
