her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
