Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Randomize