i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
