i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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