I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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