So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
