I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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