More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Oh god it's open bar.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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