What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize